Sunday, December 04, 2005

Chocolate Fountain

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Chocolate Fountain

A number of things arrived this weekend, each one shifting the tone control a degree or two further towards Christmas, parties, birthdays and the spending of money on odd, amusing and generally useless things. The second hand Nintendo Donkey Konga was the first surprise, bought in Livingstone* by means of a brilliant pocket money scam (two weeks in advance). This deadly device forces you into self mutilation on the electronic bongos as you attempt to clap, beat and boogie along with a variety of monkeys who are following a selection of sanitised tunes. It’s weird to try to keep up a rhythm to “99 Red Balloons”, Supergrass’s “Alright” and “Tubthumping” (kissin’ the night away?) and difficult not to fall into the trap of being a dumb dad who is totally unable to keep time. Is this true of our “Impossible Songs” tracks also? The Sims paid a short visit, they however will need a truckload of extra memory in order to work, bring back Lego towns and Tri-ang trains.

An outbreak of “Christmas Trees This Way!” signs has taken place on the road outside. Hardly a shock as there are Christmas trees all around us, most of which remain fixed to the ground by their own roots with no immediate plans to move. These others however, refered to by the seasonal signage will be lying like dead soldiers in the yard of the nearby sawmill. Once a healthy fall of snow has descended, at least a foot deep, we’ll don our duffle coats and squirrel skin scarves and visit the accursed spot, hand over a tenner or so and drag the fallen giant back across the snowy wastes and back to our house. Then as if in some mad transvestite ceremony devised by Prince Albert and Charles Dickens we’ll dress the dead tree up in fairy lights, tinsel and assorted tat. It’s quite fun actually – but we will wait until the week before Christmas and the tree will probably come from B&Q and I’ll have to dig the decorations out of the garage and it’ll be raining.

Mud: Sunday football a Saughton Park was a muddy affair, every time I park a huge puddle appears beneath the car so I’ve now lost all interest in cleaning it, though it now blends in with the Hopetoun / Saughton (any muddy place) battlefield landscapes like some camouflaged armoured personnel carrier. At least the boys won 6 – 3 over their Tynecastle rivals, only snag was that my little man of the match was not best pleased with his own performance. At least he did well at Donkey Konga.

I returned to find the DHL had delivered the CF, a very pleasant surprise, and an unexpected Sunday delivery of the right thing. This will form part of a big prezzie needed for next weekend as another of my offspring reaches a milestone birthday. Let’s hope that can get their act together before the 25th. I celebrated by burning a load of OOTB CDs, something I’ve been meaning to do for a while as the back catalogue was running worryingly low. Now I’ve a boxful to sell on Thursday.

Next a hike through the impossible songs folder of forgotten songs. We’ve started to plan our next recording venture and now need to wade through miles of half baked ideas and lyrics in order to demo some material for our friend Martin to start work on. We sat for an hour and two decent songs emerged, “God Bless the Witch” and “Holy Men” (there isn’t a theme here, just a tight little ball of anger rolled up in our respective chests). The other songs are ones we’ve played and gigged around for a bit, though they’ll need makeovers, hopefully more good material will emerge.

* What kind of place is Livingstone, Ned capital of Scotland? Brainless and tasteless appetites given new depths? No apparent design or plan, strewn with roundabouts, big sheds, Matalans, Currys, Carpet Drivel.. .a God awful white dome housing “designer” crap and a food court (I quite like Harry Ramsden’s mind you), impossible and confusing car parking layouts and people already in a shopping frenzy. A bit like the centre of Edinburgh I guess.

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