Once I shuffle off from this mortal coil I'll need a new profession, my current staples won't do and the pension does not reach beyond the grave. Life's tough, death is tougher. I'm intending to apply for the job of poorly paid but mischievously funny and well dressed poltergeist in either a pretentious uptown restaurant, a trendy cafe or some beard waxing type of barber's salon. There will be pots clattering, chairs moving, sinks blocking, tiny tinkles in the bathrooms and the occasional glass smashing. Nothing nasty, just slightly disturbing and peculiar ... messages smeared out on steamy mirrors etc. My imagined training and experiences at Hogwarts and time in the civil service should do me nicely.
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