Saturday, November 17, 2012

We live here - ish

Lunch time view from the kitchen. 
Lunch time view from the kitchen - close up. 
Yes, she's a rainbow.
Weeks later: Still busy with the last stages of the house move, we tied up, dusted down, unmopped and surrendered old Abercorn today. We walked away in the grey drizzle and failing light and that was that, five years later or something and the keys pushed through a letter box in a brown envelope. We came home and scoffed pasta and chicken and sadly a stray rainbow crashed into field just up the road. I don't think anybody was hurt in the incident but there was a fair amount of wine consumed and the colours started to blur. All that led to the question "would cheese chocolate cake be as good and socially acceptable as chocolate cheesecake?" I'll never know. Tomorrow the chimney sweep comes at the crack of noon, just before the American Grand Prix begins so I'm brushing up (?) on my Dick Van Dyke jokes and Mockney accents, easy peasy.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Return of the cats





The cat's (Missy and Clint) first few moments exploring their new environment in a different and foreign  house. There was a lot of scuttling, stretching, sniffing, scratching and eventually purring as they gained confidence and their bearings. The bright starry night was a big help. So their organised incarceration will now last for a few days before we unleash them on the neighbourhood moggies who furtively sneak past the windows staking their temporary claims to paths and gardens. Much chaos and hissing is likely to ensue once released.

Banned by Disney

If offended by this image then please contact Mr M Mouse & Co.
The Empire Strikes Back: I got an email today from a web site where the above photo (taken by me in John Lewis' Edinburgh) had been on display. No much of a photo really, a Lego Darth Vader store display that has hardy created a storm of comments or interest. Anyway it turns out that the owner of the "image", presumably Disney these days, has complained to the Californian website where my picture has languished for the last couple of years. Apparently I shouldn't have put it on display because...it belongs to them.  Well then Star Wars fans, look out for your future, Disney is eager to hold onto all parts of it's new investment and as part of a key marketing strategy my image has been quietly removed. Of course I've replied and told them where they can stick their Lego Star Wars, lumpy bits upwards or sideways. May the force of nothing in particular be with you, this doesn't auger well for the future of the franchise.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Rewiring an atomic bomb


Or a TV, Sky box or DVD, it's all the same really, red to red, green to green and blue to smithereens. If you're lucky or technically competent everything will work eventually one fine day.

Out and about and shopping for mug racks and beetroot (which I forgot to buy) I saw my first Christmas trees and other appalling seasonal tat on special offer of course, defiantly on display in the spirit of oafish capitalism and ignorance and asking for the fully Molotov Cocktail treatment, another fine day. Their rough brainwashing process is failing on me, thankfully. I'm no longer angry, I'm indifferent and elsewhere.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Still life with stepladder


Flit: Uneven, empty rooms and stained floors, dark and light wood, marks on walls and the brief, fading, intense tattoos we leave as we pass through the cobweb that is our bit of history. Been here, been there, got tangled, laid down and slept and then slid into a new version of this mobile freedom that takes us across the water; elsewhere. We always cross the water, symbolic and cleansing, temporary invasion that turns into settlement and an arm stretched out to find peace and meaning. So we are not here but there and everything is falling into place as if the past never happened.

James Bond- Skyfall: Quite a good movie (needs an "e" in Sky to make complete sense), takes the mind away from shelves, boxes and house moves. James is impossible, wounded, drunk and strong and unbelievably Scottish. Secrets and special effects make the action pass quickly to the tune of B&J's strawberry cheese cake ice cream and there is a good baddie to disconcert and hold in some fresh nightmare. Not a bad cinema outing for those who find loose ends useful. Take some tea with you and mind those steps on re-entry. You can also purchase your Hobbit tickets now, never thought I'd say that.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Hidden Souls



Farewell Abercorn: The big move and most of the clean up is over leaving the house a bit of a sterile and empty husk, dry and abandoned with it's own personal ghosts, our spirits have roamed and moved on. Some others will re-engage with the house some other time but not us.

Meanwhile I was so busy on the house clearing I forgot Remembrance Sunday's 11:00 silence, usually I observe a few moments for my Dad, a young sailor at sea from 1939 till 1945 and his best friend who went down with HMS Hood. All so long ago. I learned from him the importance of remembering and...today I forgot.

Friday, November 09, 2012

We once lived here


Here it is, the grand old house where we lived for more than five years bathed in the watery rays of a short lived November sun. Now we've moved on and beyond and the old ranch will hopefully have new and happy inhabitants. Today's two van, two car furniture move went remarkably smoothly (but a few weeks of planning and shuttle runs of prized possessions had taken place) and we're in, The Sky and BT Broadband are both working and only umpteen cardboard boxes remain to be emptied. Tea? Prosecco and fish and chips. A hard wired cooker and other utilities to follow.

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Unrelated rodeo


Moving house is hard work, as is real work. Both of these things are happening right now and are unavoidable and I can't be bothered to cook. What better then than an occasional extra protein and junk booster meal, it's time to return to Burger King for the Rodeo BBQ and a cheeky wee latte.

Monday, November 05, 2012

All power is...


USA: Is the tide rushing in or rushing out? Over here in the European backwoods and mother of parliaments the USA Election looks to be a peculiar and frankly distastefully undemocratic spectacle. Hysterical supporters chant meaningless  slogans and invest disproportionate amounts of faith and belief in flesh and blood politicians who they expect to improve their common lot, someplace in the future. Like some crazy Middle Eastern funeral passionate people throw themselves at unworthy saviours and swallow media driven soundbites  as if they were divine and profound utterances. Money pours down a star spangled drain of rallies and events, buttons and banners and wall to wall TV commercials. Ugh! It's all  an ugly piece of human circus and the lowest level of distorted and disfigured politics. A broken system relying upon fickle swing States and a belligerent and hostile congress that ultimately must be wrestled with and tamed. Meanwhile the poor, the needy and the ignorant look on from hurricane shelters and housing projects. All power is tyranny...sometimes.

Sunday, November 04, 2012

Birdhouse in your soul revisited



Part of the great house moving experience: Moving the bird house(s). In this Kansas blue variety (that nicely matches the Provence blue of the new house) we found this sad little abandoned egg sitting alone  in a very well constructed and cosy nest. The hard work of nest building had unfortunately come to nothing, out there in the wild it can be tough raising a family. I also suspect that one of our cats may well have had a paw in the demise of the egg's parents. We'll try again in our new location come the spring.

Saturday, November 03, 2012

Movin' on up

Cheese and chocolate melted back up tapes (remember them IT Guys?), a tasty and hot snack after  the afternnoon exertions of dumping the old cooker.  Nigella eat your heart and soggy middle out.
View from a car-wash. The clean car lasted about 12 hours.
One quirky, watery moon over West Lothian, one of the last we'll see before all the fireworks and passing grocks obliterate things.
We're frantically packing, boxes and trugs are everywhere, stuff is sorted, discarded, punted, picked and slowly transported.  It seems we've gathered and  imagined numerous possessions. Things unseen since the last move appear as if by magic and remind us of what we didn't do or forgot. It's a fascinating time. Dismantling the trampoline, unbuilding beds, doing those well avoided odd jobs that take little time anyway. Then before the crunching back ache takes hold we slump back into the warmth of the remaining couches and watch the bare walls and the Saturday telly and consider turning blood to alcohol. Tomorrow we're back for more, packing and revision, relentless laundry, fiddly allen keys and bunks and melted cheese on chili...oh and wet and muddy football somewhere.

Thursday, November 01, 2012

More banana

I took a banana to Birmingham and brought it back uneaten...kicking the can down the road. Eating an apple in the airport...leaving the bath plug in when showering...warm feet on a cold day. Hot pasta with torn chicken...reading Kindle prose and packing stuff into cardboard boxes.

It's slowly occurring to me that common blogging is fading away, as if someone had thrown a cup of water on a witch, moved on to other things, other methods, other social media, other worlds.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Don't eat the ham


Ham: The note said quite clearly don't eat the ham but alas I saw the note too late and by that time I had in fact eaten all the ham. It was of course incorporated into a little salad ensemble. Tasty.

Packing books: I was impressed that whilst packing that awkward category of books labeled "For the Garage" they all seemed to sit rather well together in a box and none of them resorted to spontaneous combustion or anything weird. The books were (and in no particular order); The Koran, The New English Bible, The Life of Buddha, The History of Witchcraft, some Richard Dawkins' stuff, Das Kapital and the Simpson's Scripts Series 4 & 5.

Wedding ring: I thought I'd lost it, I emptied out and checked three wheelie bins in the frosty dark whilst wearing a very becoming head torch (two blue recycles and a black messy bin), searched the house, began to unpack the "For the Garage" newly packed books - then I found it in my pocket. Phew.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Get one here


An oil tank that is, you know you want one, you might even need one. Just think of the 1200 litres of gay and/or merry Christmas Kerosene you could store there, just the ticket for family and friends and waifs and strays as the tail end of Hurricane Sandy Denny sweeps across the flat and pointy bits of Central Scotland as it inevitably will (so we can blame more of our serial misfortunes on our American cousins and/or global warming and instant packet soup). It'll be on Gumtree any day now and of course the lucky buyer will not only collect  it they will also uplift this wonderful garden feature that will enhance any sweet and twee suburban garden or wild country croft. It is of course empty but you can have the pleasure of filling it yourself with whatever you like, it may stink of oil for a bit though. Buyer beware and so on.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Edinburgh Daily Photo etc.

The unexpected and cold clock shop in Sighthill reminded me of a Joni Mitchell song, not sure which one but  that's how my thought processes seem to work from time to time.
Shop girls posing and giggling in a Jenner's window. I liked the hat sported by the bag lady on the left.  They seemed  amused and approved of having their photo taken by some daft middle aged shopper. 
We wandered around the capital city today in the watery sunshine. I visited Jenner's cafe for the first time in my life and supped a sunny latte and a chunk of chunky cake. Older ladies tried hard to look young and also tried softly to look after some errant grandchildren, always a cafe irritant, they sorted themselves out eventually. As the crowds gathered and circled we searched in vain for bathroom fittings, treasure chests and fancy bulbs that resemble candles. Ladies posed and chatted in shop windows and we thought about the poor guy who looks after all those clocks, this must be an awful day for him winding them up, down and backwards. I tried on tweed jackets and looked thinner than David Bowie, such was their power of optical illusion and perspective distortion. It's all in the herring bone, speaking of which I'm right back into the world of sardines - just open a tin and it's Grecian summer time somewhere. In other news the Kindle Fire HD is quite a tiny beast, could be a life changer as I'm dragged kicking, screaming and mystified into whatever century this happens to be.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Autumn trees


This nice tree is slowly changing colour as the seasons move on, the clocks change, the sun drops a few miles in the sky and the timber wolves come down from the hills ready to feast on the charred bones of lost tourists. Yes it's just another normal day in our new, ready to be explored and ploughed around garden.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Rak 600


Once I thought that all toilets and their seats were the same, designed by Leonardo Da Vinci or some other bloke like Tesla a thousand years ago at the edge of civilisation. Turns out I was wrong, I've discovered today that there are other kinds, ones with strange fastenings, in odd shapes with Italian designed features and special toggle bolts to hold them in place. I am humbled and mystified and now stuck with a spare seat that does not fit this wondrous new toilet.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Not so bad

Three beautiful Slushies photographed at the Manchester Lego Emporium and Life Long Learning Experience.
Of course things are not so bad, so says me, the ever optimistic global warming, doom and gloom denial merchant. Today I learned that there have been bumper rice and grain crops this year in lovely green Botswana, in Chile's river valleys the cotton yield is the highest ever, in the Solomon Islands the fish markets are operating at record highs. Meanwhile the Antarctica ice fields are getting colder and thicker than ever and some Rockie Mountain glaciers are growing backwards into their deep frozen mountain origins. It is however a shame that back here Autumn is upon us and that there are no horse chestnuts, no plums on the plum trees and no apples on the apple trees but clearly other parts of the world are doing OK. I also hear that you can get eight (8) Appletastic Pop-Tarts for £2 and that our dear friends at Shell and BP are selling their finest petrol for a mere £1.35 per European litre. So big fat chins up everybody and shove a little more oil into your Volvo.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Unravelled weekend

Late night birthday music with disappearing participants. Photo courtesy of Mr D Reilly.
A long weekend away from work fairly addles the brain, I needed the merry-go-round to stop this morning so I could step back into my comfortably institutionalised world (as described by Groucho) and so allow normal coffee drinking and health biscuit munching to prevail - and indeed it did. I do realise now that I've developed a taste for Scouse ( an English  food with Scottish roots), beetroot balls (?) and squeezy strawberry jam. None of these things will smooth the long journey towards my next birthday but they help along with the batch of whisky I've acquired. Now all I need to do is gather together the right tools and step again out into this dark and potholed world and build a self assembly bed or two.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Sheet music

The farewell bonfire containing yet another burning shed.
Never cool but still shit hot musicians.

After four days of organised chaos I'm slowly regaining my faculties and my a constitution is also coming back to normal, phew. Wednesday night saw us suffer a spectacular power cut that lasted more than twelve hours, not a great start for our road trip (2 x sons and 3 x grandsons) to Manchester. We left in the cold and dark and didn't stop until we reached the warm MacDonalds at Penrith. Then it was heads down and straight onto Old Trafford for a museum visit and tour of the stadium, all very good, then the movies and food in the evening. Next day we had the full blown Lego experience and then a rainy drive back up the road for a 10cc gig in Edinburgh.

10cc were never cool or popular with my rock and roll buddies. I recall being in Jersey in 1974, my ownership there of Sheet Music was subjected to a fair amount of derision and scorn, I'd brought it into our band's hippie barn and it was treated as if it was some kind of nasty infection. Of course we were working our way through Zappa's Grand Wazoo, Little Feat's Sailin' Shoes and other stuff by Poco, Pink Floyd and Bad Company. A shame really, 10cc's music still stands up pretty well after nearly forty years and the current touring band are excellent though I must confess I've not kept up with their recent output. Anyway I did rather enjoy the gig, as did a few thousand other noisy over fifties.

Saturday was all about kicking off the twelve hour party that marked my birthday and saying goodbye to Abercorn once and for all. The party ran almost to plan but with some fiery additions, a burning shed (as is the custom) and a burning birthday cake (which isn't any kind of custom), minor fireworks as Tesco allowed, dancing, drinking and a late night live jam. I was shattered but happy when we wound up and down about two.

Today was a mixture of clean up and recovery and visit for all to the new house. This was after scoffing a huge haggis and venison based breakfast - next, the tough stuff, the actual house move.