Jumper. There was a man who jumped from the
Forth Bridge and survived, he did it just the other day. The CCTVs
picked up his erratic behaviour on the bridge. They saw the signs,
they read the signs. They decided that he was likely to jump so they
scrambled a rescue boat. He spent a few moments on the bridge, maybe
running things over in his mind, then he got up on the parapet and
jumped. Jumped looking ahead, serious, determined. He travelled
through the grey air, straight down, body tight, vertical, in line
like a nail, a perfect dive, perpendicular. He hit the water and
hardly made a splash. He went under but the boat was there, on
station, hooks and lifebelts ready, hands over the side, searching.
Then they saw him. The boat picked him up alive, dazed, unconscious.
They got him ashore and rushed him to the hospital, all blue lights
and sirens. The boatmen sweated and returned to their homes, others
just carried on with other duties. There is always something else to
do. They got the man to the hospital, he came round. His only injury?
A twisted ankle.
Stooges. “Contains dangerous behaviour but in
a slapstick context” Thus reads the warning on the film currently
running at the local Odeon, the Three Stooges. It's not a franchise
I'm familiar with, I seem to have missed the Three Stooges during my
formative years, they mean very little but I do like the idea of
“dangerous behaviour but in a slapstick context”, I wonder under
what circumstances it might be used as a legal defence. Is their a
legal definition for the term “slapstick”?
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